by Ron Sukenick

   This article was originally published in The Productivity Institute (PI) Newsletter 

1. Invest more time with people – The biggest investment you will make in building relationships and proving out a productive working relationship is TIME. Simply stated, the more you know and understand others, the more likely that relationship will flourish.

2. Become purpose driven – If building relationships are going to be at the fore-front of you networking activities, then you first have to strengthen your relationship with self. Self reflection, reason for being, purpose driven and vision is an important part of that process. If you don’t take the time to sit back and work on yourself, who will?

3. Create unparallel visibility – The bottom line for more business in 2010 is simply becoming more visible. That means getting targeted with face to face and on-line social networks. While Face book is a cool place to hang out, consider strengthening your profile and connection base on such sites as LinkedIn, and other industry specific portals to make more of a professional impact worldwide. Also, take a closer look at the micro sites that are more geographic to the area where you are marketing your services and creating impact.  Some examples are – www.SmallerIndiana.com (central Indiana) www.biznik.com (Pacific Northwest) etc.

4. Develop relationship strategies – Everyone talks about relationships.  Now you can do something about it. A relationship strategy is anything that you can do that adds value to others. Strategies put you in command and control of your relationship mindset. Don’t just talk about it. Do something about it. Develop your strategies today.

5. Relentlessly follow-up -Think about some of the recent networking events you attended and ask yourself the following questions:

a. From the 10-15 people you might of met, how many actually followed up with you by sending a note in the mail, an e-mail, or a phone call and said – “What a pleasure it was meeting you at the recent any-town Chamber of Commerce event”?

b. In fact, ask yourself the same question – How many did you actually follow up with a note, an e-mail, or even a phone call?

See what I mean? I told you so. Nobody is following up with anybody.

6. Be in a hurry – The biggest driving force in most countries continues to be speed. People want what they want, and they want it NOW! Take the moment and dance with it. Don’t wait to get better connected. And don’t wait to provide the support that’s needed now by the many people your meeting.

When you act on the environment, you being proactive and by being proactive, you’re generating excitement, energy, focus, and enthusiasm. Thus leading to greater success.

If most of your efforts are in the reactive mode, it’s simply a slower process and your generating fatigue, crisis management, thus often leading to failure.

7. Find ways to become more useful and resourceful to others – Simply stated, whatever you have done to satisfy anyone yesterday, it won’t be enough to satisfy them tomorrow. Make sense? Immediately look for no less then 6 ways that you can become more useful and resourceful to others.  Keep meeting people. The more people you know that know what to do next, and know how to get things done, the more useful and resource you will be.

8. Increase you frequency of interaction – Increased interaction brings increased cooperation with others. To many times people fail to follow up with people their meeting. If you can get up to 6 interactions with anyone, it’s likely you’ll have a good beginning for a relationship that will never end. (See suggestion # 5 for more comments to support this suggestion.)

9. Join a referral club – There is a distinction in the kinds of networks that exist. Go for the strong contact, referral giving groups. The BNI’s, LeTips and the newest and closely watched Gold Star Referral Club are for sure your best bet for the greatest return on your time and money invested.

10. Connect the Dots as often as you can (making the most from the Small World Phenomena) – When was the last time you heard that infamous expression – It’s such a Small World Isn’t It? – Keep in mind that the power in your networking efforts is always in the connection. And that the connection between you and the people your meeting, is never between you and the people you’re meeting. It’s between you, them, and something else that you have in common.

11. Increase the rewardingness – If you want people to act the way you want them to act, you have to increase the rewards of being and doing business with you. Whether it’s knowing more people, becoming a better listener, or even just putting in a toll free number to reach you, people will always respond to something they like and appreciate. Keep the rewards coming.

12. Take the Joy of Interaction to higher levels – Let’s face it. The reason why you love this thing called networking is clearly because of what I call – The “Joy of Interaction”. Isn’t it fun? I didn’t say it was productive. I just said it’s fun. So when you’re out interacting with others, consider bringing the following characteristics to the table – fun, excitement, passion, creativity, dependability, responsibility and support. Make it a joyful experience for the people your meeting.

13. Go after the relationship, not just the sale – This is the very reason why most people find networking so in-effective. There going after the sale. When looking to build your business, think relationship first.

14. Don’t manage people (manage the system) – Systems build business and are more predictable and reliable. In a networking environment, it’s very difficult to get people to do what you want them to do, and if you could, it would have to be with their own willingness to get it done. Stick to a predictable system that works every time.

15. Listen three times as much – When you speak, you learn what you know. When you listen, you learn what others know. The power has always been in the listening. Here’s a good question you should ask yourself – When was the last time anyone said – Thanks for taking the time to listen? If it’s been while, go back to work and become a great listener.

In fact, great listeners, have great connections.

When all is said and done

Stay focused, challenge your thinking and underlying beliefs, be more strategic, go after the relationship, connect the dots, make the connection, and always take the moment and dance with it.

Ron Sukenick is the Chief Relationship Officer and founder of the Relationship Strategies Institute, a training and Relationship development company that provides innovative, effective and relevant programs and systems for corporations, organizations, and associations. To learn more about the value of Relationship Development, visit his Web site at www.Ronsukenick.com . You can reach Ron by phone at: 317-216-8210, or by email at rs@ronsukenick.com

by Larry Sharpe

   This article was originally published in The Productivity Institute (PI) Newsletter

We’ve all been there, at some “networking event” where all the attendees can’t wait to shove their business cards in our face.  Shark on Shark networking!  Ouch.  No problem, we’ve read books that tell us how to give a great “elevator pitch”.  So, now we are prepared for success.  We can build a real network of relationships, right?  Nope!

This is not networking; this is cold calling in person.  It’s based upon the faulty (and very common) idea that you must get your message across in 30 (or so) seconds so that the person hearing it will be ready to buy from you.  While this sounds great, it is setting you up for failure.  If you are a talented enough shark you will get some clients, but most people will simply see you as a shark. You’ll be seen as a good “X” salesperson, not as a good person or friend.  When you change jobs, and YOU WILL change jobs, you will have to start over again.  How many times have seen the same guy hustling at another networking event, now with a new company?  He will be hustling until he retires, because he’s not building relationships.

So, how we build relationships?

First, attend events that meet often, at least monthly.  This way you can see the same people over and over and begin to become friends.  In addition, you can spend time with each person and create a real bond, instead of rushing to collect cards.  If you don’t get to them this meeting, there’s always next meeting.

Second, attend events where you are one of (if not the only) person who does what you do.  An example: If you are a PR person, stay away from PR/communication events and visit doctor associations.  This way you will be different and memorable.  In addition, you will be an assumed expert; since the attendees will see you often and hear you talk about your business often.

Third, speak about your business like you are just giving info, not like you are selling.  Bad example 1: “You can get placement in top magazines like, A, B and C.  Wouldn’t that be great for someone like you?”  Bad example 2: “I help companies like yours make PR work for them.  PR stands for Profits!” Good example: “Companies are using us to get positioned as an expert in the media so they can better validate their pricing.”   The top two examples will push people away.  The bottom one may actually draw them in. 

Fourth, treat NO ONE as a possible client!  Treat everyone as a possible referral source ONLY.  If you show them how to be a hero for their contacts, they are more apt to give you referrals.  In addition, if they see value for themselves, they will ask!  That means they decided to buy and were not sold.  This is a great basis for relationship selling. Also, MOST people are not your direct client, but most people are referral sources.  If you sell to them only, that’s nice, but if you get into their circles of influence, you’ve hit the mother lode.

Fifth, make your goal NOT to sell anyone, but to be memorable so you can follow up.  There are two secrets here:  1 – The more THEY TALK the more memorable you are.  2 – If your follow up fails, then your networking fails.  If you remember anything from this article remember these last two items!  They are critical.

Sixth, make your follow up NON business.  After the event do NOT send any marketing material!  Just send a nice e-mail and then ask for a meeting, a coffee, a lunch, etc…  The goal is to see how the two of you can work together.  If they are interested in buying your product/service they tell you.  Again, they have bought and haven’t been sold.  If that’s the case, you can set up a sales call.  If not, just get to know them and see if you can work together.  If not, no worries, you made a good contact that may be a good referral source, reference or possible client in the future.  You have just added someone who knows, likes and trusts you to your network.  Keep in mind, the more elite your client base is, the more they do business exclusively through referral!  The “elephants” always look for someone they know.

If you follow these tactics at every event, you will build a real network that will be there - on going.  Whether you change jobs or need help, they will still be there for clients, advice, referrals and/or even job offers.  This takes time, but is long lasting.  It is NOT cold calling in person, it’s real networking: relationship building!

Good luck!

Larry Sharpe is the Director of Neo-Sage, an influence training center in New York City.  Clients learn how to navigate relationships effectively in sales, customer service, negotiations and even in personal life.  It’s real psychology, not folklore.  He’s a Board Member of the Association for Corporate Growth, an Assistant Director for Business Networking International and a Guest Instructor at Columbia’s Graduate School of Business.  Please visit www.neo-sage.com for more info.