More than words – Tips to Hone Great Listening Skills
by Katie Mead
This article was originally published in The Productivity Institute (PI) Newsletter
We all know the value of superlative communication skills. However, too often when we think of being a great communicator we think ‘words’ – what we say and how we say it. But a crucial aspect of being a great communicator is having great listening skills. Excellent communication is a two way street – here are some tips to hone your listening skills:
Repeat it back
One of the best ways to ensure you’ve heard correctly is to repeat the information as it’s given. This will help to avoid misunderstandings down the road, and indicate in the moment a high level of involvement. It proves you were listening and helps you remember what was said later.
Write it down
Remember taking notes at school? For memory retention this is a great tool. At a directors’ meeting, a job interview, or a sales pitch, let your audience know you’ll be taking notes and write down all the important points. You’ll broadcast your commitment to the conversation and be amazed at how much you remember at the end of the day.
Ask questions
Great listening is also about clarity, and the best way to ensure understanding is to ask questions. If there’s something you’re not clear about, ask. If you want to show your audience that you are truly engaged by what they’re saying, ask. It will be clear that you’re paying attention, and they’ll appreciate your interest.
Maintain eye-contact
We’ve all had conversations with someone who won’t look you in the eye, and we all know how unsettling that can be. To be a great listener, you have to pay attention. And one of the best ways to focus on doing that is to maintain eye-contact. The speaker will feel respected by your attention level, and it will give you a great chance to pick up on any non-verbal cues. Again, it’s all about clarity.
Avoid distraction
As a great listener you want your speaker to know that you’re paying attention. Turn off your phone, turn off your TV, resist the temptation to check your email, and let others know that you don’t want to be disturbed. Make sure you choose a setting in which you’re both comfortable – this could be your office or a busy coffee shop – whichever suits the situation best. By demonstrating consideration and respect, you’ll also make it easier to focus on what you’re hearing.
Practice makes perfect
Like any learned skill, the best way to master being a good listener is to practice. Every time someone engages you in conversation, practice listening actively. Whether at the playground or a cocktail party, make the most of your opportunity to practice listening. Not only will you strengthen existing relationships, but you’ll make active listening a habit.
Don’t make it about you
Listening with empathy goes a long way to becoming a great listener. If you’re not thinking about how what the speaker’s saying relates to you, or what your response should be, you’ll be more engaged and won’t miss key concepts. If you truly want to hear what the other person is saying you’ll find it much easier to listen actively and remember what was said.
Developing great communication skills takes time. Focusing on what someone else is saying will help you understand and communicate with them better; so will knowing the difference between hearing and really listening. To be a great communicator knowing what to say is only half the battle. Knowing when to listen is just as important. Keep your mouth shut, your ears open, listen with respect and good intentions, and you’ll learn a lot.
Katie Mead is the co-founder of Springboard Consulting, Katie is a passionate about good communication. From a diverse background in the fine arts, she has developed a proven track record of success working in both the for-profit and non-profit sectors. Her particular areas of expertise include marketing, grant writing, non-profit resource building and management, fundraising, and the design and launch of various keynote projects and events. Katie serves as a founding member of RECREATURA_Arts & Culture, an international arts organization. Read more from Katie on her blog site: A Love of Art.

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